A while back, I was talking with someone who was struggling with his marriage.  I made a couple of suggestions.  He pushed back.  He said, “It’s not like I’m not doing anything!”

“Great,” I said, “Tell me what you are doing.”

“I’ve read some articles and stuff.  I did some research. . . ”

He continued on for a few minutes.  But I quickly realized my friend had made a crucial mistake.  He had confused distraction with action.  He was worried about his marriage, sure.  But he was distracted.  His distraction was confused with action.

Nothing was happening.

When we talked again, a few months later, his wife had left.  He told me he “did everything he could.”

I asked what that was.  I suspected.  I was right.  He spent the time in distraction.  In the end, there was no action.

Are you making the same mistake?

I discuss the distractions — and the actions — in this week’s podcast.

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